Bocephus, Fontana Fallout, and the King! (There's really only one) Parker's Points! | Sports & Recreation
CONCORD - Now he's quoting Hank Jr., and talking about some other guy called the King? What is the deal with Adrian Parker?
He was the fearsome football flash for the South Rowan Raiders, the BMOC at Catawba College, the PR genius for some of NASCAR's top drivers, a practitioner of bovine aviation, the communications czar at Charlotte Motor Speedway, and now, the business manager for Matt Kenseth. And in between all of his duties he manages to bring us Parker's Points every week! So, without further fluff...here we go...
With apologies to Bocephus…
Mothers against drunk drivers, the Pope is against the pill
The Union’s against the workers working against their will
The President’s against the Congress, the Senate is against the House
People are against politicians and I’m against cats in the house
Hank Williams, Jr.’s “I’m for Love” is the song that comes to mind when thinking of the fallout from the race at Fontana, Calif. Fontana! Not Martinsville or Bristol but big ol’, two-mile, multi-grooved Auto Club Speedway produced a slobberknocking finish that could be the best of the season.
What happened after the white flag flew was all one could ask for in a NASCAR race, and then some. Hatfield and McCoy… er, Hamlin and Logano, whose rivalry was already red hot, battled for the win until wrecking in the final turn. After the race, Tony Stewart parked his car next to Logano and proceeded to get in a slight physical altercation with him as the crews intervened and pulled the two apart.
Which reminds me of an old track promoter’s adage, often imparted to drivers ahead of a race, “If you’re going to fight, do it on the front stretch!” Meaning, at least do it to where everyone can see it and you’re providing entertainment for the crowd. Stewart’s a track promoter. He gets it!
Then, Stewart let loose a tirade more suitable for HBO than Fox, but the button pushers in the production truck were fortunately, shall we say, up on the wheel.
The final 15 minutes of the Fontana broadcast left everyone salivating for more NASCAR, which is a good thing considering the sport’s smallest track, Martinsville, is a terrific place to settle scores this weekend.
Oh yeah, Kyle Busch won the race.
ON A SEROIUS NOTE, Hamlin sustain a fractured L1 vertebrae in the last lap wreck and will be sidelined for several weeks while Mark Martin and then Brian Vickers keeps his seat warm.
Hamlin is one tough hombre and it wouldn’t surprise me to see him back sooner than the six weeks originally given that he would be out. He’s a wheelman and I’m sure sitting these next few races out will be extremely difficult for him. He’ll have a tall task ahead of him to make the Chase when he gets back in the car, but if anyone can do it, it’s Hamlin and the No. 11 team.
It’s past time for NASCAR and the tracks to add SAFER barriers at these higher-speed tracks. The formula should be simple: if a car can hit it at a high-rate of speed during racing conditions, put a SAFER barrier there. Had a SAFER barrier been where the No. 11 hit, maybe Hamlin doesn’t get injured or maybe he does, but it was a vicious hit that could’ve have been softened. The technology exists. It’s time to cover these exposed trouble zones.
HEY LOOK MAW, Matt Kenseth has a new website. Why is that newsworthy? Because this is Parker’s Points and Parker had a hand in the new site. In total, the new website required 636,000 total man-hours with an average of 300 people working on the project per day. Each man averaged an 11.78-hour workday.
OK, maybe that’s what it took to build zMAX Dragway but suffice to say it was a lot of work and the folks at RACERSITES, out of Davidson, N.C., along with Kenseth’s longtime web administrator Rae Augenstein did a great job with the new site. Go check it out at www.mattkenseth.com and tell ‘em AP sent you.
IN OTHER NEWS Dale Earnhardt Jr. will make his 600th NASCAR start this weekend at Martinsville. That includes both Sprint Cup Series and Nationwide Series starts. Is that a significant milestone? Not really. But the fact he’ll win on his 600th start is significant.
But I’m for love and I’m for happiness
And I’m for if you don’t like it can’t you just let it pass?
Finally, if Hank Jr. isn’t your cup of tea, perhaps you prefer The King. No, calm down David, I’m not talking about Richard Petty; I’m talking Elvis Presley. Charlotte Motor Speedway’s AutoFair is this weekend and they’re featuring Elvis memorabilia straight from Graceland including his daily driver, a ’56 Lincoln Continental.
They’re also having an American Idol for Elvis impersonators so expect to see an army of bedazzled leisure-suited, middle-aged men with too much chest hair traipsing through a sea of pristine collectible automobiles. ‘Merica!